The New Rick Livermore Site : What's your story?

Thursday, October 5, 2023

What's your story?

Hi RICHARD,

I want to share a story with you from Bettina, a staff member on my team, whose story has helped others in their pro-life work.

Her powerful testimony brings healing, hope, and restoration to women and men struggling with post-abortion regret.

Here is her story in her own words:

When I was younger, I had an abortion. For too long, I buried my secret and never told a soul what had happened to me - and my baby - in that "clinic."

I grew up in an environment where human life had little value and the dignity of each individual person was a foreign concept.

My parents divorced when I was a toddler. My mom, despite her affection for violent men, booze, and cocaine, won custody of me, and my upbringing was tough, to say the least.

One of my earlier memories is of my mom leaving me outside an ex-boyfriend's house in the car with the engine running so she could make a quick escape. I watched as she piled all of his clothes onto the front yard, doused them in lighter fluid, then dropped a match on them before speeding away.

I was fourteen when I found my mom's crack pipe. By that time, she had all but stopped buying groceries, and my half-brother had taught me how to shoplift from the local convenience store to keep from going hungry. To stay warm, we learned how to flip the electricity back on after the utility company shut it off.

If you can believe it, it came as a relief when a SWAT team burst in to take my mom and her violent boyfriend away for counterfeiting Social Security cards and possessing illegal drugs.

I was on my own, and needless to say, and I didn't make very good decisions. I got pregnant at 16. I knew right away, somehow, as if the life within me announced herself. I confirmed it with a pregnancy test I took in the restroom at a used book store.

For everyone I confided in, abortion was a forgone conclusion. No one even considered a different possibility. I wasn't asked if I wanted my baby. Adoption never came up as an alternative. It seemed that everyone just spoke abortion into existence.

"When are you getting the abortion?" "I bet you can't wait." "Don't worry, you'll feel better after you get it done."

And I believed it. All of it.

Included in the chorus was the nurse at Planned Parenthood, where I went to get a second test. I was hoping against hope that the first test, and what my body was telling me, were wrong. They weren't, and the nurse launched into a well-rehearsed speech.

"Of course you can't even consider having your baby. Your reputation, your hopes, your dreams, your goals, your whole future will all be ruined if you carry to term. Imagine the suffering of the poor child! It's not fair to bring a baby into the world at your age -- you're still a child yourself. Imagine your baby's shame. The best thing you can do, the only thing you can do, is terminate your pregnancy."

It was like being swept away by a pro-abortion wave. And I ignored the little voice inside of me telling me I was carrying a baby, my baby, and let myself get swept up into the tide.

I got the abortion.

I killed my child.

Once you've broken the bond of life, once you've ignored that little voice inside of you, you are a lot more likely to do it again. So, when I got pregnant again, I went right back and got another abortion. This only made my pain worse.

My abortions solved nothing. They did nothing to make my life better, despite all the promises that it would, and despite the assurances of sunnier days ahead. No one tells you about that.

Now, I've discovered the peace and healing that so many with experiences like mine desperately need.

The only thing that helps the pain in my soul is my Church. As I grew older, the very few people in whom I confided my story tried to comfort me with platitudes like "You made a hard choice, but ultimately, you probably did the right thing."

My Church was the only place where I heard the whole truth about my abortions. They weren't afraid to tell me what I already knew deep down in my heart - that what I did was wrong, and a grave sin.

But the Church has also laid out a clear path for reconciliation with God and I follow it as best I can. I follow it with the hope that one day I can lay eyes on my two children for the first time in heaven, and beg them for forgiveness, too.

I don't know if you have an abortion story. But, if you do, I wanted you to know that I do, too. You are not alone. The feelings of shame or guilt do not define you and there is healing for what you've experienced.

These feelings also don't respect gender. Women and men experience the shame and guilt of abortion choices and both need healing.

RICHARD, too many women and men bear the grief and trauma of killing their preborn children.

And too many men and women have been silenced by the media, academia, politics, and sometimes even their families. They have been pressured to hide the truth of post-abortion trauma and regret.

For this reason, Live Action created a multi-faceted website, Can't Stay Silent, to provide a safe place for these voices to spread the truth about post-abortion trauma and inspire hope in others in similar situations.

The website has three main elements:

Testimonials of healing from women like Bettina who had abortions and regret them, and a place for anyone to submit their post-abortion story
A take-down of the often cited "Turnaway Study"
An investigative report revealing the true impact of abortion on individuals and society at large

I encourage you to explore https://www.cantstaysilent.com/ and share the link with anyone you know who has been impacted by abortion.

Thank you for taking the time to hear stories like Bettina's. As she told me, the most effective way we can help women heal from abortion is to help prevent them from ever having one, and these testimonies can be a powerful tool for doing just that.

For Life,

Lila Rose

President and Founder